It’s time for Creativity to be Like Sex (21 ways, actually)

Courtney Smith Kramer’s

For the last year, I’ve been working feverishly on incubating my baby – my new book, titled “21 Reasons Creativity is Like Sex”. Creativity is a passion for me, as Executive Creative Director at my company, PureMatter, and I am a long time lover of all things random, eclectic, weird, strange, serendipitous and surreal.

Curiosity is strong.

Little did I know, that the timing of my book launch would coincide with one of the most polarizing and confusing times America has seen in decades. What was supposed to be a happy, light and innuendous (I made that up) experience now finds itself suffocated by sentiments of hate, contempt and inhumanity.

Well, fuck. It didn’t take me long to realize that now, more than ever, we NEED laughter. We NEED lightness. We need to be reminded that despite our politics, we are all, as humans, bonded together by our ability to be creative…

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Why are Successful boys Heartless?

Becoming successful is not easy. Today it takes more than perfecting a single trait to attain the real success. Of which, people only perceive the top or the exposed part and do not really dig deeper to know what kind of a person he is and what it did cost the person to reach his current position until and unless he is an idol to them.

The movies as we know today, portrait a rich or successful guy as a mean person who thinks “He can buy anything in the world”. I’m not talking about the movies made specifically around a successful protagonist, because of course, protagonist is never mean and if he is, they remedy that with a storyline and change it in the end!

I am talking about other movies, Titanic for example, Mr Hockley has been shown as a “successful” bad guy who is condescending to almost everyone. What did he do? Tried to win his lady with a necklace and that too not any necklace, an 86 carat diamond called “Heart of the Ocean”. Is it a bad thing? I don’t think so. But yeah they presented him as a bad guy by showing his ruthless nature towards his “Bride to Be”.

Enough with the movies!

Coming to the point here, Successful guys, may or may not think of them as superior to others which is equally true for the rest of the guys too. So how is this opinion made a bit too often of the successful.

Keep on reading to know……..

Every successful individual knows why certain people are attached to their lives. He knows what he means to a particular person.

And as said by Chanakya,

“There is no Friendship without Self Interest”

Do you remember that first person from your high school you became friends with? Why did you become friend with the one person sitting right next to you in your first class? “You wanted a friend” in that particular environment. Hence, the Self Interest.

So the above statement is valid for every friendship. You can verify it yourself too.

Human nature is to find benefits in every situation.

Now consider a situation, you’re not successful and can’t really give anyone any professional help. You are only good at providing the Emotional guidance and help which can be misinterpreted as love or maybe fondness for someone. Now this someone can be your potential love interest as well. Now since you listen to them and take care of them which every successful guy is equally capable of doing by the way, that’s exactly what people will conceive of you.

But the time you start building yourself up professionally, people stop looking for feelings and start looking for your practicality. The skills you have acquired and mastered somehow outshadow your feelings and emotional nature in the minds of others. Now if you’re trying to talk to a girl that you consider as being a nice person, she might think of you as the one who can give her great professional advice being successful and nothing more.

Now think of someone successful whom people have been seeking for advice and try to squeeze out any little detail of his success out of him. How would he react to someone not actually looking for advice but an emotional bond? He might as well perceive everyone interested in their lives as looking for professional benefits and nothing more. More often than not people actually try to find the answer to the question “Is he/she of any use to me?” in their first meeting and if the answer is yes, they get along with him/her and the rest of the time they ignore.

Picture Credits- simplereminders.com

So as a conclusion, we can say that attraction towards someone is superficial stuff which either is there or is not. People want what you’ve got and that’s what you can offer anyway. So that’s what successful boys do, they try to offer the wealth and end up being the ones thinking of themselves as superior to others and heartless.

Note: Do not seek people for benefits only. Try to consider their emotions as well. If you’ve got yourself into a relationship with someone, do ask them, what they think of you?. If all they talk about is how you are so knowledgeable and inspiring, just know that they think of you as a mentor or something and nothing else. But if they comment on your physical aspects, praising your smile and your emotional and social traits as well than only you should consider taking it any further! 


Education System, Uncategorized

“Do not sell Education, instead try to impart Knowledge”

Values and mastery in a particular domain/field is a matter of time and mentorship available. Teachers are subject to making futuristic thinkers, complex problem solvers, and most importantly better individuals who are passionate about imparting their knowledge and leverage the same for building a better tomorrow. Everyone knows the importance of a good mentor. A person who can launch you towards your goals. Who can precisely direct you towards your dreams. But this article is not about mentors or education system. This is about what should be the personal motto of each and every one of us.


Here’s the story:

The basic needs are required to be fulfilled, one way or the other. Teachers have their own needs to get their families better stuff and services, a better living. But to introspect, the needs that they had when they were growing up to be this “provider for a household” were different, weren’t they?


Lets see! They wanted fun, frolic, tasty and delicious food, chance to talk to the significant other and most importantly knowledge. Knowledge that was cheap and timely that satisfied their crave for success.

                                “One who wants to learn is never satisfied easily”

We’ve always wanted someone strict towards sharing his knowledge and have always hated the one trainer, who just asks for the money as we come to or leave the classroom. What kind of education system is this?


Okay! it is right to ask for money for the services being provided, but don’t you think the sole mindset of getting the students to pay the money as soon as they enroll themselves or start the class indicates nothing but

  1. The mentors nowadays doubt that the students will leave the course without paying once they get to know that the teacher is lacking the capabilities to teach well.


2. Do they only think of teaching as a business? To lure students into getting                                  themselves enrolled not because they want to but just because they need to, to get                  good grades by showing a bunch of unworthy certificates.

I am not saying it is the fault of mentors. They6629054127_6651867221_b‘ve got to earn for themselves, agreed! But there’s more to imparting knowledge than just money. If you are finally able to get them to pay the whole fees by the first week, it becomes your duty to give full attention and get each and every related concept to their notice and make it clear. Guide them so they know what they are doing and for what they’re doing it.

Satisfaction in return for the money paid is not a lot to ask for. But this is what some of you mentors are unable to provide them. Maybe you’ve thought the same when you were in your primes, thinking of achieving something great, while cursing daily for having your knowledge basket  always “half-empty”.

So for a teacher the Motto must be to impart quality knowledge first, earning money is second.

This is a matter of priorities that need to be considered first. The moral obligation served well can only make you eligible to qualify as a real teacher, a mentor, a guide who would not only be looked upto as an idol but also your methodologies will live far longer amongst the students of your students.

This article is nothing but a try to remind those who have opened institutions for nothing but to earn huge lots of money for providing low level education deteriorating the values attached to teacher-student paradigm.

The reason why our youth is unemployed is the lack of quality education. And the reason for most of them could be the cost.

A note to the government: Don’t keep on opening new schools and so called knowledge centers in the name of development and Education. Try to improve the Existing system by providing eligible teachers who can generate the mentors of tomorrow. Who should be ready to teach out-of -syllabus topics for the sake of knowledge and not just worry to finish the text or earn the money.


                           “Do not sell Education, instead try to impart Knowledge”


Workout to gain some Perspective

At some point in life each one of us has questioned our life choices. It happens to all of us. Holiday season’s are sometimes the most depressing as you have the time to overthink. We not only question the paths we followed but also begin to feel that our life is going down the dumpster. The worrisome part though, it happens two or three times a year or maybe more frequently depending on the phase of life you are going through. For example, 25 year olds trying to get a job might suffer from this more as compared to a high school student.

Although it is good to recall and evaluate your progress but it should be a healthy process. You should not start to hate yourself or be grumpy about everything around you. It should be to gain some perspective and get on with your life. As the saying goes “Lift Yourself UP, Dust Yourself Off, and Start Over”. You don’t need to regret about anything.  Whatever has happened was meant to happen. So all you got to do is be patient and happy.

There is simple way to be successful – Happiness

Happiness Brings Success! So all you need to do is

  1. Be Happy when you wake up.
  2. Be Happy when you go to bed.

Following these two rules is not simple. You can only be happy in the morning and while going to bed, if you’ve done sufficient amount of required work, you need to do. For example, If you’re preparing for an exam and you finished legitimate amount of syllabus by the end of the day that will make you not worry about the next day, you ultimately are going to be happy. So just do what you gotta do.

What if you don’t know what to do?

Well, that’s a toughy! Is that what you’re thinking? Actually it is quite simple. The idea of working out to lay-off some heat and stress. Its your holidays and you want to enjoy them. Don’t you? Then why are you thinking so much? Go out for a run or hit the gym. You would not only be happy to see the results and realise how people at your workplace will envy your fitness but it will also remove the negative energy and inner turmoil and will help you gain some perspective.

The same goes if you’re going through a difficult time in life. It could be anything. Stress between a relationship, family or anything else. If you just can’t figure out what to do, just escape into the nature, go for a run and see how it makes everything clear and simple.


Tricks to Drain-Out Negativity

Continuous stress of job or the fear of failure in the exam you’re going to take this weekend, negativity has its roots deep down in our minds that usually numbs the brain which otherwise could be doing a lot more on the productive grounds. Your mind keeps on shouting “This fear is real”, “This fear doesn’t let you flourish”, “You’ve got to get past it”, but you don’t know what to do.

For Example – 3 days before a Job interview you are ready to answer the questions that the Interviewer might ask. You’ve done your homework. Ready to take on anything and ablaze with confidence. Soon you realise that you should read up on the the projects you have mentioned on your CV. Now with this realization comes the thought of knowing the basics of building that project. You, the person that until now has been calling himself the most fortunate man/woman has suddenly started to doubt his/her potential. As these negative thoughts creep in they make you feel like you’ve done a terrible crime.

Relate to the situation above. This happens before exams as well. Although we have learnt everything we need. We still feel like something’s left or something we might forget. It is good practice to revise but overdoing and worrying would not get you anywhere as we have already discussed Don’t Be Over Cautious.

The Tricks we should account on in these situations are very well known but haven’t been practiced by us. Either we are tired of the day job or we are just not interested until we accept that only through these we could actually find our way to glory.

The Tricks are:

  1. Workout
  2. Writing

The time for these two W’s once we start stuffing in our schedule could do wonders. These two are the proven ways of getting rid of negativity. Apart from this, they’ll keep you in better shape both physically and mentally. So let’s just drain-out these negative thoughts that make us hollow. Feel your worth, respect the work you’ve done and the realise the worth of your Hard work.


First make us woo and then tell us how to do!

We study our whole life trying to remember each and every lesson of that elementary classroom book laid down according to the syllabi. We learn and pass the exams getting past every standard. But do we ever recall the syllabus of our previous class, maybe a little bit. But the syllabus that we once read two or three years ago is lost in a haste of our memory, isn’t it? Also we never bother to recall it until it is the only option in front of us.

In actuality, syllabus goes from basics to the pro level. We first learn the basics and then go on to developing something in future. But wouldn’t it be amazing if we get to know beforehand about what  we can do with it eventually. This could be helpful in generating interest in the young minds and they can start exploring the field as soon as they get a good grip over it and not two or three years later when they come to know that the thing they are dealing with, in one way or the other stems from the same basics they once learnt from the elementary book.

For example, who bothers about the transistors, capacitors and semiconductors while learning the basics of Electrical engineering except those having distinctive and innate instinct. They only feel keen about the basics when they are stuck in future making something out of, what we call it logic circuits or something.

Finally after all those years of “syllabus making no sense”, now is the time when our Interest builds up and we are fascinated by something and recognise what we want to do in future. But wait a minute, Is all of the above only true with Electronics? Maybe we get fascinated by the chemistry as well. Also don’t forget the programming part. So we are still unclear about which way to go and what degree or diploma to pursue.

Maybe this could have helped:

If the mentors, while teaching the basics would have thrown some light over the future of whatever they’re teaching and the ongoing innovation or recent usage of such concepts, students will be enamoured by the concepts and will try to start making their mind about which way to go and concentrating their whole lot of early age energy towards their goal. So this might guarantee no hectic mind boggling to decide a field of study in future.

So First make us woo and then tell us how to do!



Don’t be cautious. Just let your Conscience do the Job!

Many a times in this extreme life of ours, we come across situation that make us sweat through our pants. We get so nervous that we actually forget to be indulgent in whatever is going on around us. The effect of this is that the desire of us being the life of the party is completely shattered and believe me it’s not cool at all!

How many times did you end up being a loser after talking to a girl you like. Yeah! you kept whining about the same for many days and eventually made the rest of your days even worst and you know that.


At the starting of this article, I called our life as being “extreme”. Some of you might be thinking, this guy is just considering those born in the rich and famous families but am not. Actually each one of us has an interesting life, we just need to know it. “Boredom is a state of mind”  and no one is boring.

We have all got things to learn, studies to pursue, workout to do, singing and dancing lessons to practice, games to play and shopping to do. But everything is ruined if you are overly cautious and have nothing but the “care to take” in your mind.

I am not asking you to be reckless but at least enjoy while doing something and let the things happen by themselves. For example : You have newly learnt how to speak in English and  you know how to comprehend and reply. But while replying you go so much into making your thoughts up that you mess the whole sentence and speak the words out so fast that they go over the head of the one you are with. Please just let the normal flow of words go on. Don’t overthink.

Overly cautious people are not enjoyable. There are some things better done as it is. So you are in a competition, Singing if you will. You have memorized your song, practiced it but still worry about forgetting it on the stage. So what you do is, keep on reading the lyrics until the last moment and jumble every line as you set foot on the stage. I bet this is what you will curse about after loosing.

Remember that there is really nothing to be nervous about unless you are trying to be in the same cage as a family of Lions. Forget about the judgemental people. They are going to judge whatever. Just learn that you are ready to blow the minds up and take your act to the extremities savouring each and every step.